Titans East Meet Fan Fiction
by Camlop
Summary: Beast Boy and Cyborg force Titans East, Kid Flash, Jinx, Herald, Jericho, Argent, and Kole to read fan fiction. When the Titans East/Honorary Titans find out who they're frequently shipped with, what chaos ensues?


**A/N: One part of the story may seem familiar to you, if you've read my fan fiction, "The Mary-Sue Scheme." I included an excerpt of this story in that one.**

**ALSO, for the parts where Mas y Menos speak, yes, I took Spanish class, but their Spanish is too advanced for me to write, so forgive me if it's broken because I'm using good, ol' Google Translate, just like most fan fic authors.**

**SUMMARY: Beast Boy and Cyborg decide to prank Titans East and show them fan fiction! What could go wrong?**

CLACK, CLACK, CLACK—BEEEEEP.

Cyborg had just typed in a security override passcode into a keypad hidden outside the Titans East tower. He looked over at Beast Boy and grinned mischievously as the doors slid open, permitting them access. Right behind them were Kid Flash, Jinx, Argent, Kole, Jericho, and Herald.

"Alright, BB, it's your plan," Cyborg began as the group stepped into the tower and closed the doors. "What next?"  
"I'm gonna make sure none of them are in the Main Ops room."

"What's going on?" Jinx asked, her hands on her hips. She looked impatient.

"You'll see," Beast Boy grinned. He transformed into a rat and he scurried to the elevator, which led him up to the Main Ops level. Cyborg was to stay down in the lobby to initiate the lockdown when Beast Boy ordered him to.

Sure enough, the Main Ops room was empty, but Cyborg had done a scan of the tower before the two friends entered and Cyborg found out that all of the Titans were present. _They're probably in their rooms, _Beast Boy thought to himself. He transformed into his human self and he hurried to the computer at the front of the Main Ops. Acting fast, he quickly brought up the fan fiction site and extended it to the television. It was time to initiate Part B of the plan. Beast Boy pulled out his communicator.

"Cyborg, come in Cyborg," Beast Boy said. The half-robot popped up onto the screen. "Send 'em in."

Within a matter of minutes, the Honorary Titans were in the Main Ops room. _I hope their cities won't be attacked while they're here, _the green changeling thought. He transformed into an octopus and grabbed the bugle out of Herald's hand. Beast Boy shapeshifted into a T-Rex and roared.

The roar apparently worked; Bumblebee ran into the room with Speedy, Aqualad, Mas, and Menos following behind. She froze in her tracks and raised an eyebrow when she spotted the green dinosaur. Her sass coming out, she put her hands on her hips.

"Alright, Beast Boy; what are you doing here?"  
Beast Boy shifted back into himself, grinning. He swiftly pulled out his communicator with his free hand; no one had bothered to get Herald his bugle back. "Cyborg, come in, Cyborg!"

Titans East looked confused as to why Beast Boy was calling Cyborg. Bumblebee approached Beast Boy. "Hey, let me talk to Sparky."

Suddenly metal panels popped out of the walls and blocked the doors and windows. Titans East and the Honorary Titans looked around frantically, wondering what was going on. Bumblebee gave Beast Boy an exasperated look.

"Beast Boy! You don't look like you're freaking out, which means you have something to do with this. What's up?"  
Beast Boy lifted his communicator so that it was facing Titans East. Cyborg was on the screen. He had a malicious grin.

"I'm not withdrawing this lockdown until you read something called _fan fiction. _BB took the honors of setting it up on your computer and television lockdown will automatically repeal in an hour, but until then, I'm forcing you to read at least five fan fiction stories. You want the lockdown to end faster? Read it and weep!"

Beast Boy turned the communicator towards him. "Uh, Cyborg?"

"Wha—oh, right."

Beast Boy hurried to the doors just in time for Cyborg to temporarily repeal the lockdown. Cyborg then initiated the lockdown again, but only so that it affected the Main Ops room. Titans East and the Honorary Titans groaned.

"Is there _any _way out of here?" Argent asked with her accent.

Bumblebee sighed and shook her head. "I'll try overriding the security system, but Cyborg knows it better than I do."

The Titans East leader walked over to a security panel in the kitchen and she typed in five different passcodes; nothing happened. She groaned, stomped her foot, and pulled out her communicator.

"Cyborg, come in, Cyborg," she growled into the yellow T-Communicator. Cyborg popped up.

"Problems?"

"Yeah! Let us out of here!" Bumblebee demanded. She glanced at the fridge, which Speedy was rummaging through with an unreadable expression. "We don't have enough food for _all_ of our guests," She turned around to see a bag of take-out on the kitchen counter. That had _not _been there before. "Hold up, Sparky."

Bumblebee approached the bags, which Kid Flash and Speedy were practically attacking. She pulled out the receipt from one of them and raised an eyebrow. The meals had just been purchased a minute ago, literally; and the customer's name? Kid Flash.

She hesitated; should she make a scene about Kid Flash being able to vibrate his molecules through solid objects? He could go get Cyborg and force him to withdraw the lockdown. And if Kid Flash refused, she and the other Titans could use more… _forceful _actions. But she _was _curious as to what 'fan fiction' was.

The Titans East leader decided to stay quiet and not remind the others about Kid Flash's molecule vibration. Hopefully none of them would remember. But why did Cyborg and Beast Boy lock them in? Maybe this fan fiction thing was a bad idea…

Herald manned the computer and he looked at the list of fan fiction stories on the screen. "Alright, you heard Cyborg. I'm gonna read out the pairings here… on the side of the screen, it has the definition for something called 'ships.' Apparently, ships are pairing up two Titans romantically, even if it's not a real relationship." Herald skimmed through the list and raised an eyebrow. "Alright… we've got CyBee, CyJinx"—Kid Flash shot Jinx a confused look—"Flinx—that's Kid Flash and Jinx—AquaRaven, Speedy and Cheshire—okay, that's weird—Speedy and… oh, man, ha, ha!" Herald burst into laughter.

The Titans looked up at the screen, confused. Then they saw it: Speedy x Robin. Speedy shot forward and looked at all of the Titans. "THIS IS RIDICULOUS!"  
Mas y Menos just looked confused. They turned to Argent and Kole, but the girls shrugged, stifling giggles.

Herald continued. "CyBee, CyBee, CyJinx—man, he's popular with the ladies—AquaStar, Jericho and Kole, Speedy and Cheshire, Flinx, Flinx, Speedy and Chesire—man, do you like the bad girls?"

Speedy groaned. "This is ridiculous."

"Alright, there's also Terra and Aqualad, Aqualad and Raven, Kid Flash and Raven"—Jinx shot a glare at Kid Flash; she remembered his race against Mas y Menos during which he flirted with Raven, Argent, and civilians—"and—oh, man, Speedy and Aqualad!"

Aqualad and Speedy's faces paled. The next statement wasn't any better.

"Oh, man, there's TWENTY Speedy and Aqualad ships!"

Promptly, Aqualad and Speedy fainted.

Kole kneeled by the two boys. "They're out cold. Too bad we're locked in here and can't take them to the infirmary, but they'll be fine, anyway."

Kid Flash and Bumblebee picked up the two Titans East members and threw them onto the sofa. Bumblebee checked their temperatures by resting the back of her hand on their foreheads. She turned and crossed her arms.

"Kole's right. And this is actually amusing; keep on readin', Herald."

"Yes, ma'am," Herald said. He looked back at the list. "There's just as many Aqualad and Raven fan fics—oh, no."

The Titans noticed the next fan fiction was a slash between Aqualad and Beast Boy. They all collapsed, clutching their stomachs as they entered hysterical laughing fits.

Herald and Kole were the first ones to recover. Herald brushed dust off his cape and thighs, and he sat back down in the swivel chair. "Calm down, y'all. There's quite a few Terra and Aqualad ones, but let's move on to another vic—erm, Titan." With a few clicks, he was looking at another Titans' ships. "Most of the Bumblebee ships either involve Cyborg or Speedy," Herald glanced back at Bumblebee, whose face had gone white, and then he looked at Speedy who, along with Aqualad, was still out. "Good thing he's not awake to hear this; he might shoot me with his whole arsenal of arrows."  
"Do _you _have any ships, Herald?" Bumblebee quickly asked, composing herself. She put her hands on her hips.

"Only a few, but they're all with the most random Titans," Herald explained. He clicked and opened up a list of Jericho's ships. "Now _Jericho's _the one you should be questioning."

Everyone turned to look at Jericho. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, looking confused. Their attention was stolen, though, when Herald suddenly broke into laughter, pointing at the screen.

Jericho paled. Quickly, he signed—he's mute, what did you expect?—_"Kyd Wykkyd? Beast Boy? Raven? Robin? MORE Kyd Wykkyd? Kole? I wouldn't mind being shipped with Kole, but with ROBIN? BEAST BOY? KYD WYKKYD? THIS IS BLASPHEMY!"_

"Join the club," Bumblebee muttered, glancing at Speedy as he slumbered.

"Jinx mostly has ships with Kid Flash, but there's several with Cyborg, Raven, and See-More," Herald said, but only Kole heard him; the others were still talking about their slashes and ships which, for the most part, they disagreed with. "Alright, order in the court! The next ships are with Kid Flash."  
Jinx promptly grabbed Kid Flash's arm, entwining hers with his. Kid Flash looked down at his girlfriend and smiled reassuringly, but she looked very unsettled, impatient, and as though she was prepared to beat the pulp out of someone.

"Alright, every ship on the list is between Kid Flash and Jinx," Herald stated, prompting Jinx to loosen her grip on Kid Flash and smile, but he quickly raised a finger. "Wait a sec, we've got… one Kid Flash with Raven."

Jinx took in a deep breath, but Kid Flash took her hand reassuringly. "Don't worry, Jinx; it's just a fan fiction. It's not real."

"It better not," Jinx muttered under her breath, looking down at the ground with furrowed eyebrows. No one heard her.

Herald cleared his throat. "Next up is Kole. She's only got fan fics with Jericho."

Kole and Jericho looked at each other with blank expressions, and Jericho signed, "Apparently our non-existent relationship is popular amongst our fans."

Kole nodded. "True."

"There's two about Mas y Menos," Herald noted, opening the stories in different tabs to read later. "I'll read 'em later. Let's move on to Speedy. Can someone wake him up?"

"Esa es una sugerencia de mala," Mas said. **["That's a bad suggestion."]**

Menos continued off of Mas' sentence. "Tratamos de despertar a Speedy el mes pasado; Speedy quedó sorprendida y le disparó Mas con un flecha." **["We tried to wake up Speedy last month; Speedy was startled and shot Mas with an arrow."]**

Mas quickly clarified on Speedy's part. "Pero era un accidente!" **["But it was an accident!"]**

The Titans nodded, and Herald turned back to the computer. "There's a lot of Speedy and Raven ships, not to mention Speedy and Cheshires. Oh, and the occasional Robin slash. That's all of 'em. Let's read some."

Speedy and Aqualad had come to—and Kid Flash took the honors of filling them in on what they missed—and they fainted again, but this time they were only unconscious for five minutes. They woke up just in time for the second fan fiction which, thankfully, didn't involve them.

"That's wrong!" Bumblebee yelled after going several paragraphs into a Mas y Menos fan fiction. "Sparky—er, Cyborg—told me that Gizmo's twelve years old, and Raven told Aqualad a while back about Melvin, Timmy Tantrum, and the other kid, Teether or whatever. Melvin's, like, seven or something, and although Mas y Menos are around Gizmo's age, Melvin is not even close! That's total pedophilia, even though they're all pre-pubescent! This is blasphem—"

"Yo, Bumbles, chill," Speedy said, cutting her off as he laid on the sofa with his feet outstretched onto the coffee table. His left arm rested on the backrest of the sofa while he munched on a fish taco with the other, much to Aqualad's annoyance.

"Maybe you're a little _too_ chill," Aqualad snapped, seething at the sight of Speedy eating seafood. "You have no respect at all! I mean, look at you: you're eating a _fish taco!" _

"Mahi mahi," Speedy clarified, smiling. "Been saving it in the fridge since yesterday. Surprised you didn't notice and throw it out, but I'm grateful."

Aqualad grumbled. "Can we replace you with Robin? No one would notice at first."

Speedy finished his taco, crumbled up the wrapping paper, and he tossed it aside, brushing the crumbs off his hands. He bent one leg over the other as he pulled out a compact mirror and a comb. He began running the comb through his straight, flat hair, which added to his usual vain, laid-back demeanor.

"Just because I have an identical mask doesn't mean anyone's stupid enough to mistake me for Robin… _Unitard Guy," _Speedy's grin widened as he recalled the time Titans East had taken temporary responsibility over Jump City while the original Titans went off to battle the Brotherhood of Evil.

"I completely believe you, _Robin," _Aqualad retorted, mimicking Speedy's posture on the sofa. "Anyway, can we get back to the fan fiction before Speedy does something _else _to tempt me into feeding him to raging piranhas?"

Speedy shook his head, chuckling to himself while Herald began reading the rest of the fan fiction. The next time Speedy and Aqualad interacted with each other was when they read a fan fiction shipping them with Starfire, Raven, and… Robin.

Jinx had nearly blown up the tower when she was forced to read a Kid Flash and Raven fan fic. Kid Flash had to convince his girlfriend to _not _attack Raven; after all, she didn't do anything. But that gave Jinx the grounds for attacking Kid Flash instead, and while Bumblebee, Aqualad, and Kole shielded Kid Flash—much to Speedy's amusement—Mas y Menos along with Argent managed to calm Jinx down.

"If anyone, you should be attacking the fan fiction authors," Argent said, but when a smirk creeped onto Jinx's face, Argent quickly added, "But don't do that! You're a heroine; you don't hurt innocent people."

"Whoever wrote that story is _not _innocent! They're sick and disgusting and I oughta—"

"Look, Jinx, dear," Argent sighed. "Maybe our fans just aren't familiar with you and Kid Flash's relationship. Maybe they have no idea."

"Oh, I'll make it clear, then," Jinx growled, rolling up her sleeves and clenching her fists. "I'll make it _very_ clear!"  
"C'mon, hon," Kid Flash said, approaching Jinx slowly while Bumblebee, Aqualad, and Kole watched from behind, chattering their teeth nervously. "You're my girl, and I'm your boy. Their opinions won't change that."  
Amazingly, this worked, and Jinx calmed down. She sighed. "Maybe I need anger management classes like Hot Spot. I'm awful! I'm sorry, Wally."

"'Wally'?" Speedy and Aqualad snickered. Argent and Bumblebee shot them angry looks, which shut them up.

Kid Flash kissed Jinx on the forehead, and they walked back to the sofa from the kitchen, where Jinx had chased Kid Flash—although, he could've just escaped the tower altogether, but in his opinion, reasoning and explaining was more effective.

"This next one is a Jericho and Beast Boy slash," Herald snickered. _"The climb to the top of the mountain was worth it. Beast Boy spotted Jericho and his eyes—"_

The computer screen shattered, and so did the television screen. Herald jumped, startled, and he turned to see Jinx's hand raised. Argent withdrew her glowing red hammer.

"Jinx! Argent! What was that for?"  
"We're done torturing everyone," Jinx said.

Argent continued. "And that was five, mate. We're done here. Anyone up for scones?"

Kid Flash appeared with a bag that had the Eiffel Tower printed on it. He held it up and pointed to it, but he was looking at Jinx, smiling. With a French accent, he asked, "Croissants, anyone?"

In a matter of five minutes, the fridge was completely emptied, along with the bag of croissants, seafood, and the boxes of Chinese take-out. The panels opened and the lockdown deactivated.

"LOCKDOWN WITHDRAWN," a robotic voice spoke from the computer; it still worked, it was just the screen that was broken.

The Titans cheered, but Jinx merely smiled and crossed her arms. A scheme was bubbling up in her head. Kid Flash noticed the look on her face.

"Jinx?" He asked, but she was too engrossed in her own thoughts. "Earth to my lucky charm!"

She snapped out of it. "Huh? Oh! Sorry," she said, blushing. The rest of the Titans looked over at her. "Guys, I have an idea. We're going to get back at Cyborg and Beast Boy."  
-

A few hours later, Kid Flash found himself sitting across from Jinx in a fancy restaurant. They had travelled to several cities, having dates along the way… all in one day.

"You work fast," Jinx commented, smiling and taking a bite of her chicken Caesar salad.

"That I do," Kid Flash replied, grinning and sitting back in his chair. His communicator vibrated and he pulled it out, knowing who it was. He smiled. "Kid Flash speaking."  
"Did you send Ash here?" Beast Boy asked, looking angry. Kid Flash could see the rest of the Titans in the background; they all looked very furious, exhausted, and irritated.

Kid Flash smiled, amused. "Yep."

A few minutes of being scolded by Beast Boy passed, and Kid Flash hung up. He put the communicator away and he grinned at his pink-haired girlfriend. "We got 'em good."

"That, we did," Jinx said, partially mimicking his words from earlier. The two leaned over their table and lightly kissed.

The couple enjoyed their meal for another half hour, talking about just about everything, when suddenly they recognized a voice. They looked up to see Robin and the rest of the Teen Titans glaring down at them. Kid Flash smiled sheepishly while Jinx rolled her eyes.

"Kid Flash," Robin said, sneering. His arms were crossed.

"That's my name, racing's the game," Kid Flash said, standing up and paying his bill (the waitress showed up at that exact moment). He made his way to Jinx and picked her up, Bridal-style. "Try and catch me!" And with that said, he disappeared, leaving a breeze to chill the Titans. They groaned.

"Coward!" Cyborg called after Kid Flash, although he was sure Kid Flash was out of earshot by now.

THE END


End file.
